spring time?! really?

snow on my glasses
i had to go find my scarf
what the hell spring time?!

migraine

the migraine fairy...
is a little bitch
i hope i don't barf

jonesing for some sugar

want to eat skittles
but high fructose corn syrup
will kill me stone dead

monday

monday inventor
it's a good thing you are dead
cuz i would kill you

(And I'm only assuming whoever invented Mondays is dead because we've had Mondays for a long, long time)

this happens on friday... a lot

a wrinkle in time
physical laws are broken
the clock stopped moving

Here are some job related haikus I wrote yesterday

whoever told me
education opens doors
had a real degree

thirty resumes
you would think would be enough
guess what. you are wrong

spring sunshine mocks me
"marketable degree, ass"
I weep and agree

princess cranky pants
filled with urgh and self loathing
writes bitter haikus

Thoreau watched ants
total hippie, got a book deal
now i want a pond

would join the circus
if clowns weren't so satanic.
maybe for the best

welcome to cranky haikus

my cranky haikus
a coping mechanism
to laugh, not freak out

Haikus have long been my favorite way to encompass crankiness in pithy awesomeness. Because if you can laugh, or at least scoff, or at least talk shit on a problem, it's a little more helpful than crying about it.